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Remembering Tricia

Tricia’s poignant post from 2016

With the litany of high-profile deaths in 2016, I’ve been wondering… Why? What’s the takeaway?

For my generation, these were our idols. We sang into hairbrushes and dressed up on Halloween as these people. Still do. Maybe it’s all a big billboard reminder to those of us who grew up in the 80s:

Start living like you want to be remembered.

You don’t necessarily get to choose how you die but you can choose how you live. I’m not talking about being eulogized for some list of accomplishments, fame or fortune, but how you conducted your life… Were you kind? Generous? Insightful? Did you use whatever talents you were given to better the world, touch heartstrings or inspire other people? Did you liberate others by being your most awesome weird authentic self? Did you love courageously from the inside out?

For celebrities, the pressure to stay youthful and relevant seems to play out in a large-scale steroid version of the same thing all we non-famous people face. If you once garnered a lot attention for being hot stuff in your hey-day, all the more distressful its gotta be for that to fade. Preservation only goes so far. Truth is, the only way to NOT get old is to die young, and what fun is that? There needs to be more focus on how to *evolve* your sense of self, value to society, definition of beauty, inside and out. (We heard you, Carrie Fisher!) Midlife “crisis” should be more of a pivot or shift so it doesn’t feel like (or become) a dead-end. There’s something deeper.

What I think is especially poignant about the passing of stars like Bowie or Prince or George Michael… for whatever personal struggles they faced over recent years, most were still in the process of reinventing themselves, trying new things, recording, advising, filming, creating. It feels so tragic to be cut off unfinished, and also… very inspiring. Keep on learning, exploring, trying, teaching, giving, loving meaningfully to your dying day. And be kind to your body. Never know when it’s going to “go all 2016 on you.”

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